To want better for yourself
While health and vitality are responsible for the natural physical condition of a person, peace and happiness are responsible for the natural emotional state.
There is a modern parable about this.
A group of prestigious university alumni, highly established in their careers, decided to visit their old university professor. The conversation turned on work: the alumni complained of various difficulties and problems in life. Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups - porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the coffee.
When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said:
Notice that all the nice-looking cups have been taken up, leaving behind the cheap ones. While such an approach is normal for you - to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. You should understand that the cup itself cannot make the coffee better. In most cases it is just more expensive and, in some cases, even hides what we drink. You really wanted coffee, not the cup. You consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups.
Now consider this: Life is the coffee; the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain your life. The type of cup we have does not define, nor change the quality of life we live. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee.
The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything.
When you feel that you have lost peace of mind and happiness, this can only mean one thing - something that you are doing or telling is wrong.
A human being is very complicated. The feelings of well-being and illness, pleasure, and distress can be caused by an infinite number of factors. Your inner feeling of happiness is the best indicator telling you what to pay attention to and what to try to avoid. The failures in life are like a pain to the body. They are sent to warn you that things you are doing are not useful for you.
Three myths about happiness
People do not listen to their own self for many reasons. For some reason, they refuse to use a feeling of happiness as the indicator, which can help to judge events of life. There are three main myths about happiness, and they affect each of us, to some extent.
The first myth:
Happiness is not something that you have deserved. The main thing is that others have it, you can wait. Many people are adamant in their belief that happiness cannot be the goal in life: goals are one thing, and happiness is quite another thing, not everyone has it. They believe it is better to make others happy because their happiness is more important than their own.
This point of view does not make sense. People focus on happiness, on maintaining and increasing its level. It is ordained by nature that our emotions affect all that we do. It is the indisputable fact that you cannot give people more than you have. If you do not have money you cannot give it to the poor, therefore, if you are miserable, you cannot make anyone happy. The best way to ensure the happiness of others is to be happy yourself and then share it with them.
Once, a wise man was walking along the road admiring the beauty of nature and tasting the joys of life. Suddenly, he saw a miserly hunched man carrying a backbreaking burden.
Why do you, strange man, doom yourself to suffering? - the sage asked.
I suffer for the happiness of my children and grandchildren - the man answered proudly. — Everybody have suffered: my great grandfather for the happiness of my grandfather, my grandfather for the happiness of my father, and my father for my happiness. And now it is my turn to make children and grandchildren happy.
And has somebody been happy in your family? - the sage asked.
No. But I believe that my children or grandchildren someday will be happy! - the miserly man answered sadly. Yes, the illiterate cannot learn to read, and the mole cannot bring up the eagle! - the sage said softly. – First, you need to learn to be happy yourself. Only then you'll know how to make your children and grandchildren happy!
The second myth is closely related to the first one: first of all we have to serve others, not ourselves. There are many books that reflect this theme. They say that we will justify our life on earth, only if we make someone happy. To some extent that is true, but not entirely.
It is true to the extent that service to others is one of the main goals of a human being. That is how we get a sense of self-worth and a sense of being. The realization that we benefit somebody gives us a sense of freedom, we rise above boredom and routine. To paraphrase the words of Robert Louis Stevenson, everybody earns a living serving someone. However, the matter is that your service should come from overflowing happiness.
Yes, we have to serve others, but we have to receive pleasure and satisfaction as well. One of the requirements of a high self-esteem and confidence is a feeling that we contribute to the world in which we live, that we give more than we take. Thus, we serve others to make ourselves happier.
The third myth of happiness is that happiness should be such as someone else considers it to be. Often we feel uncomfortable if we do not feel joy of any event, which, in the opinion of others, should make us happy. Many people let parents influence their career choice and suffer as a result. They want to please their loved ones, but are not able to have positive emotions about what they do.
Life and happiness resemble a smorgasbord. If 100 people will come to this table and put the food they want on their plates, then everyone will have a different set of products. Even husband and wife would return with plates filled quite differently.
Happiness looks about the same. It is composed of a variety of components - physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Every person requires a special combination to feel happy.
Practice
Happiness is in your hands! Be positive and active creators of your life. In the evenings think back over your day and remember good things that happened, even a minor thing can raise your spirit, do not miss these moments!
Thank you so much:)